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| Trying my hand at painting pumpkins |
I recently read a superb Sherlock fanfiction entitled There's a First Time for Everything (by Kate_Lear, in case anyone is interested - I highly recommend it, but I'm a high-functioning fangirl ;) ). I thought it was a nice balance to all the 'lasts' that I've been encountering.
I'm not a fan of endings and I hate saying goodbye. In fact, I often say "See you later" even if I know that I will never ever see that person again. I just hate the finality of 'goodbye.' So these last few weeks home are proving to be difficult.
I spent the majority of the day yesterday at my lovely alma mater to say goodbye to all the professors I held so dear over the last two and a half years of my degree. I was fortunate enough to be given the opportunity to get to know my professors better than most students. Thanks to my indecisiveness in choosing a major, once I finished my sophomore year, all I had left were major requirements. So I spent A LOT of time with the sociology professors. Then at the end of my junior year I was hired as the departmental assistant. I thought it was one of the best gigs on campus - I spent time around my favorite professors and got paid to do mindless tasks like make copies and run errands. It may sound dull, but when you are a senior bogged down with assignments and post-college plans, mindless is good. But anyway, back to yesterday. It was hard sitting in the lounge chatting with all the people who had such an impact on my life knowing that it might well be the last time that I see some of them. I know that I can keep in touch through emails and letters and all that jazz, but I know how it goes. My mom is a teacher and I have been a student for a very long time. Just because you have that bond one year doesn't mean it sticks. They will be too busy to reply to emails and soon I will be just another graduate. I don't blame them, I understand. It's just hard for me to let go.
I still have some friends to see before I leave. A birthday celebration tomorrow for one of them will be a nice way to say goodbye publicly, so I won't get upset of choked up or anything. If I'm lucky, I'll be able to see a few of my closer friends from college there.
Over the last few days my calendar has quickly been filling with dinner dates and lunches and visits (I'm probably going to gain 10 pounds next week). I'm trying valiantly not to think about saying goodbye to my wonderful boss-turned-friend, or the ladies at the ELCDC who literally shaped my college career, or the fantastic math teacher my mom met last year at work. And don't even get me started on my second mom. That one is going to be rough.
But goodbyes are not the only types of lasts. The last meal at my favorite crepe restaurant, the last BLT at the local farmer's market, the last painting class my mom and I took together (aren't those pumpkins pretty?), the last time I hear the ice cream man go by (I'm starting to sound like a foodaholic - I swear I'm not)...
I guess the point of this whole thing is that I'm going to be an emotional wreck for the next week. And this time next week, all the goodbyes will be over and I will be on my way.
Oh, and packing? There are piles all over my bedroom and I have discovered that my wardrobe is overly unprepared to hold up against Englanders for a year...Marshall's, here I come...
-RJ
